Published Wednesday, October 21, 2009 12:26 PM
Updated Wednesday, October 21, 2009 12:27 PM
The beginning of fall is a subject I celebrate about this time every year.
In fact, it seems like only yesterday the skies brightened, the sun started hanging low, and the temperatures dropped a delicious thirty degrees.
Actually, it was yesterday – and not a moment too soon.
Not too long ago, I used to bitterly complain about season changes. It’s true; I hate being cold. Long ago, I noticed one does not have to shovel heat, nor is anyone from here moving to Cleveland for the climate.
But in recent times, I have changed. As much as I hate to be cold, as much as I deplore having to wear shoes and socks, as much as I like running around outside wearing nothing more than a pair of cut off shorts and wife beater, even I get tired of the summer.
They say, “Spring has sprung,” but I beg to differ. Spring is a slow awakening, made all the more cruel because it takes its time and it teases mercilessly.
Fall, on the other hand, is the one that suddenly and deliciously pounces on our sensibilities. All at once, along come those perfect crystal skies, those nights so full of stars you’d think someone spilled a bucket of hot diamonds on black velvet. During the day the sun is still warm and friendly, but gives way to a delicious cool slide as twilight steals into the evening.
Even as a kid, I can remember really enjoying the fall. The downside, of course, was that school was back in session, and fewer things are designed to destroy a kid’s fun than 5-7 hours of long division, vocabulary tests, and the principal exports of Peru. But for those few precious hours of sunlight after school, wow! Remember jumping in huge piles of raked leaves? Remember how they felt stuck in the back of your shirt? Remember the
crotchety old curmudgeon down the street who spent all weekend raking them into perfect piles charging out of his front door yelling incomprehensible threats and waving a big stick?
On Saturdays, someone’s dad would always be burning a pile of leaves or pinecones. This meant you could have hours of running around beating each other with flaming brands or trying to scare little sister with tales of witch burnings and deep woods Indian attacks. If mom and dad were too closely supervising the operation, you could always have a bucket of quiet fun melting hundreds of those little plastic green Army men.
And as the days grew shorter, you also knew it was almost time for Halloween. Granted, these days I’m not as crazy about Halloween, but back in the day it was an event rivaled only by the pure unbridled avarice of Christmas morning.
The one constant through the years is the fact that Fall is the season for really good times outside. October surf, those long, chest-to-head-high organ barrels that come rolling in about now and will be consistent for about the next three weeks, is the best South Carolina has to offer. But for those who don’t surf or don’t care about the ocean, there are plenty of other delectable sybaritic pursuits.
Spectacular turning leaves on winding mountain roads. Hot girls in tight sweaters. Cook outs. Hot girls in tight sweaters. College football. Hot girls in tight sweaters. Oyster Roasts, truly the greatest parties ever invented. Hot girls in tight sweaters.
And pig pickings! Holy arteriosclerosis! A big ol’ deep rubbed, spritzed-out, mopped down hog, homemade slaw, mountains of rice and hash, and enough beer to make the job of maintaining perfect cooking temperature and keeping up with his quarter-hour ablutions not just fun, but downright adventurous.
Oh yeah, did I mention hot girls in tight sweaters?
The best thing about fall is the fact that your options are only as limited as you want them to be. If you want to paint landscapes, well, the light is perfect for that sort of thing this time of year. If you like sitting around your patio with a book and a beverage, what a great time to do just that. If you want to get out and dig in garden dirt, well, that may be the closest thing to being a kid again.
As for me, I’m thinking once I rake the leaves into a big pile for burning, it might be fun to melt some little plastic Army men.